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Stellar Journal Now

I'm the Master of the Common Cold – and I Can Share with You How to Avoid One

This time last year, I ended up participating in a broadcast with three singers. Present were a hip-hop artist with Ghanaian roots, a well-known pop singer, and an acclaimed classical singer. It was deep midwinter. The night before, I celebrated a close friend's milestone birthday, crammed into the function room of a pub somewhere in Surrey. It had been a good night, however at that moment, just for something to say, I pondered how it was possible to avoid catching a cold when half the people at the party were contributing to a chorus of sniffles and coughs. Incidentally, why do certain individuals blow their noses so loudly, while others are quieter? Something to explore later.

Their Take of the Singers

When I brought up my evening, these three musicians backstage at the TV studio took two actions. To begin with, they moved back a bit. Second, they started a passionate debate on how to avoid catching colds which naturally enough given their line of work was almost an obsession. I understand that, but I have skin in this game too – I must avoid colds at all costs since my colds are more severe than others'. I don’t have a medical certificate to confirm this, but I know it to be true. My symptoms persist. My nose is more blocked, my throat feels rougher, my coughs are harsher, more persistent and seem infinite. My relatives, wise to the couple of quick throat-clearances which herald the coming storm, sometimes banish me or clear the room themselves. Back when I presented football on ITV, my poor colleagues in the studio gallery learned to recognize the signals. “Cans off!” the studio director would holler to the staff to avoid auditory overload, blowing the wiring in their headphones.

Handling Nasal Congestion

Regarding my nasal issues, don’t start me. Aerosols, liquids, even the sharp aroma of warm spirits my mum prescribes … they all work for a while until they fail. And there’s nothing as pitiable than a Brummie tone delivered with no nasal airflow. That is, it can sound nasal even normally. At least this elicits sympathy, though that's not necessarily beneficial. During my initial university year, separated from family care, the cleaning staff at our accommodation showed me kindness. “I have the perfect solution, you unfortunate soul. I'll return shortly.” She was extremely kind, with a strong Irish accent, and very insistent that I ate the uncooked, peeled onion she presented to me. She monitored my consumption. Kind soul. It didn't help at all, unfortunately, other than causing digestive turmoil and creating bad breath.

The Vocalist’s Cold Avoidance Regime

Therefore, I hate colds and am quite sure that prevention is better than the cures which traditional or modern, fail to help. I paid close attention then together with the other artists while she explained her health practices. With forthcoming bookings to sing for her supper over Christmas, she approached it with great diligence. She commanded us to sanitize hands regularly all winter long as far as I could deduce in addition, there were special precautions required for social events and gatherings. Prior to socializing, she suggested a few applications of Vicks First Defence into both nostrils – even if healthy. Drastic. I like it. Moreover, she required a repeat application after the party with another couple of squirts of the product.

My Experience

I adopted the method. And I have to say I remained cold-free. It wasn't perfect: the countless bottles of First Defence I bought, mislaid, reacquired, located, and more. And that dispiriting moment you realise you’ve sat on the little vessel of hand gel stored in your pocket and it's leaking all over. Still, a small cost for the benefit. With winter returning, I'm stocked up with the singer's suggested supplies. I’m ready for battle.

By

Henry Smith

Astrophysicist and science communicator passionate about unraveling the mysteries of the universe.

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